5 Pandemic-related thoughts; Sunday Selfie

Whew! I can barely type anymore. My brain is in a fog. There is garden to be planted, house to clean; stuff to sew and thoughts - so many thoughts.

I scuttled my first Thought #1. It was divisive but writing it made me feel better.

So my new Thought #1 is this.
Write down the things that anger you instead of shouting them out. Write down your worries. Write down your disappointments. Write down your hardships.  Somehow, seeing them spread out in black (or blue or red or even chartreuse) is a release.  And, sometimes it puts your worries into a more healthy perspective.

(CAVEAT: Writing down reports of dangerous behavior will NOT help you. If you or your loved ones are abusive or dangerously careless of themselves or others, reach out for help.)

Thought #2
How does going over and over the timeline of missed opportunities help us?

Now is the time to concentrate on finding solutions. If our government can't get moving due to lack of science, or lack of experience, or lack of attention, or, blast them, lack of concern, then we have to save ourselves. Support our front line workers. Invest in companies that are producing research based tests and treatments. Also, vote the buggers out! Write your representatives. now.

Find ways to work with others to promote responsible behavior. Make masks. Wear masks. Wash hands. Stay six feet apart. (Oh, that one is so hard when there are Moms to hug.)

Thought #3
Breathe.

Thought #4
Give thanks for all the people who are finding ways to connect safely; the artists who post their songs, artwork, dance, musical pieces and theater attempts, stories and writings online for everyone to enjoy.

Libraries that offer meetings on internet based networking sites; teachers that contact their students often to keep them up to date; friends who photograph the beautiful and delightful things in their life and share those photos; children who create chalk drawings to cheer up their neighbors. Poets who find new ways to view our predicament. Be grateful for what we have. Reach out to others who have less.

Thought #5
Lift each other up.  Sing. Breathe. Bake. Find the flower in the sidewalk and celebrate it.
Be kind. Be truthful. Be careful. Be brave.

Sunday Selfie - Self care or self indulgence?

When life fills up with commitments, self care goes out the window.  Promises to eat more healthfully, to move more, to take time to relax or to be still, get broken.

One reason for this is that time is not, as physicists want us to believe, flexible - at least, not for us non-physicists. Minutes tick by while we wait for an elderly relative to get cleaned up so we can visit with her. Hours disappear when we must prepare for a presentation. Suddenly, it is late. We are stressed. OK, I am stressed. The idea of a trip to the gym, or even 30 minutes of stretching feels like a punishment after a long day.

Since I have never been a "routine" person, preferring to control my own destiny (HA!), rather than to follow a strict schedule, it feels easier for me to just push through the things I must do for others and neglect to do things that are good for me.

Part of this is cultural. Self care feels like self indulgence. Taking care of others' needs seems more productive than walking for an hour. During that walk, nothing is cleaned. No errands are run. No words are written. An unselfish person would use that time to take care of someone, volunteer somewhere, make a difference somehow.

Forget just sitting. I love just sitting. It recharges me at a cellular level. If I want to just sit, I need to look like I am doing something - crochet a few rows, play a mindless game. My fingers or my hands or my body must be busy because, as we all learned when we were young, "Idle hands are the devil's workshop."  NOT!  So very not.

Look at self care this way. Refusing to take care of ourselves is an insult to the Divine. Our selves are our greatest gift and our best tool with which to do God's work. When we opt for another commitment, or choose not to stretch because we have so much to do today, we are mistreating God's blessings - our beings.

When we are exhausted and scatterbrained because our diets do not fuel our needs, or because we neglect to rest, we can not be a service to others. It's like putting on your own oxygen mask in a flight emergency BEFORE assisting others.  If you don't, you might pass out before you can help someone who depends on you. Then you both suffer or die. This is a bad thing. Just saying.

Self care is not just eating right, exercising, getting enough rest, staying hydrated. Those are all good things. Self care includes making time for things that feed our souls - crafting arts, listening to music, reading, sitting, hobbies, playing sports, spending time with friends.

For the rebels among us, be even more rebellious. Say "no", and gift yourself with time.  If you prefer routine, schedule in that ME time. You are worth it. The world deserves your best self.

Take care of your selves.

  

What We Don't Need

I went to the store today - primarily to recycle a HUGE plastic bag filled with plastic bags. But, I needed things I can't get at the discount grocer of my choice. (Aldi's, if you must know.) I wanted a scent free spot remover for my laundry. I wanted white whole wheat flour.

I came home without the scent free spot remover.

I don't need it!  Freedom!

Someone came into worship today wearing a beautiful necklace. Another person sported lovely rubber boots. I wanted the necklace AND the boots.

I don't need them! Freedom!

All winter I have worn the same three pullovers to the gym and to the library. I finger the new long sleeved tees and blouses at the store. Then I remember.

I don't need them! Freedom!

We don't need all the things we see in Sunday's paper, or on television. We don't need a car to make us feel powerful. We don't need the spinning broom to clean our floors.  (I bought one. We don't need them. Really.) Yet, we spend a lot of time making money to spend on things we don't need.

More than anything, we don't need things that make us feel inadequate. We don't need to be in a constant state of envy or desire. Look around. Unless you are homeless or nearly there, starving or very ill, you have what the things you need.

And if your heart hurts, if you are lonely, sad or angry, there is not a single thing in this world that will take that pain away. Then you must find the answer among your friends, among nature, in the hands of whatever you view as divine.

Marie Kondo talks about things that give you joy. We DO need those; a new journal, a box of sharpened colored pencils, a clever tin, a cozy throw. For some, joy will come with a new hair color - play! Or a jacket that fits just right. Or a custom car cleansing done by someone else. Or a new sautè pan.

Invite in the things YOU need, the things that give YOU Joy. Don't be seduced by ads, fashion, and what you think is required of you. Think how easy your life will be when everything that surrounds you, warms you.

Me, I need empty tea tins, my family and a Little Blue Bunny.