Wishes

I went for my Medicare Wellness "event" today.  Your tax dollars at work!!!  And really, what else would you want to spend your tax dollars on but the chance to keep me around long enough to record my new song - or a podcast - or write that, no, THOSE books I keep nattering on about writing?

Growing old is ... better than NOT growing old. 

There are some things that I will never get the chance to do.  Those things are pretty much related to my aging body and to my lack of interest in doing them; i.e. I will never have a second child; I will never climb Mt. Everest.

But important things like -
Make a difference
Write a book
Paint a picture
Help a child find their passion - for this week - and another one next week
Sing a song
Share a story
Learn to dance

Understand physics??? -
there is still a lot of time to do those things.

I wish I could decide where to place the time I have left.  There are so many, many things I hope to do.  My biggest wish of all?  It's that everyone realizes that it is Not Too Late to do most of the things you dreamed of doing.  In the doing of those things, you will ease the regret that might come from those dreams that will never come true.

I wish you hope!

Moody Monday

Actually, Friday, Saturday and Sunday were the Moody days.  Today, I feel cooooolll - as in summer breezes blowing through my window.  Yeah.

Man, I was in a funk.  I had some very angst-ridden conversations with two people - about each other - and I came away wondering which version was closer to the truth.  When that happens to me, I begin to find cracks in all the safe places.  I start to wonder if other people have secrets that would shock or upset me... if everyone is hiding some horrid past.

Then I snipe at those people closest to me.  And I cringe at my own tone of voice.

I found the absolutely PERFECT book for my mood; Lauren Myracle's The Forgetting Spell. 

 

I suspect I may have found Darya's confusion a bit much at another time, but I was that perplexed and twisted that it was a relief to read about someone - even a young teen - who had similar feelings.   

If you read Wishing Day, you understand the set up.  The girls of Darya's town have a tradition of making three wishes (one impossible wish, one wish she can make come true, and one wish closest to her heart) by the wishing tree three months to the day after their thirteenth birthday.  Darya's family, rumored to possess magic,  started the tradition ages ago. 

The flashbacks - most involving the mysterious Bird Lady - help fill in the gaps.  Darya approaches her thirteenth birthday full of doubts.  A new friend missed the tradition of wishing.  Darya wonders if she should use one of her wishes for that friend.  Someone from Darya's family pressures Darya to use one of her wishes to solve a long standing problem.  The request is almost threatening and certainly creepy.  Darya doubts everyone, including herself.  

It was like we were emotional twins.  I feel your pain Darya and I am 5 times your age.

She makes her wishes. Whew!  That pressure is off.  And, like almost everyone else who admitted their wishes, she regrets them and hopes they work out in the end.  The pressure ends but not the drama.

Darya is the second of three sisters, all aged a year apart.  There will be one more book, for sure.  This is good because a lot of stuff is left hanging.  And I want someone to let me, and Darya, know that her wishes -or anyone's wishes -  are not the cause of happiness or pain in other people's lives. 

I had one wish - to return to equilibrium.  I read a book.  It worked.